So I have a bit of a routine that is working for me. Tuesday mornings I call my sister that’s just older than me, or she calls me. Once in a while I’ll still be sleeping in and I’ll wake up to the phone call from her and other times she’ll get side tracked and I’ll be the one calling her. All in all though we talk almost every Tuesday, occasionally she’ll be “having a life” and I get a bit sad cause I didn’t get my dose of “Delle” for the week but it makes the next week even better.

This week when she called she had company over and was wondering if I’d be joining her for morning coffee and then my boy could visit with another boy his age that she was babysitting. Instead I went over today, and after lunch we went to the farm (aka “Dad’s”) to help Dad clean up the upstairs cause he has been doing lots of renovations and they are looking amazing. But, with the amount that Mom used to hang on to stuff (and the stuff I would keep) Dad didn’t know what to do with everything; it’s hard to decide what other people will remember and be sentimental about. So Delle and I went through the main cupboard that was upstairs and as I was going through it there were so many memories that were bubbling up inside.

It was good to be having these memories though, as strange as that might sound. Because mom passed away often the memories that I have make me feel a bit down because I can’t share them with her but that wasn’t how I was feeling today. I was feeling that we (meaning me) need to get our stuff upstairs cleaned up for dad. He’s been very patient but there isn’t a fair reason for him to have to work around my stuff when I’ve been moved out for 5 years now.

We managed to get the main cupboard sorted through. Dad commented that it could be refinished because it is an antique so I really hope that he does (maybe after my schedule gets changed I”ll be able to build a better relationship with him by doing things like that). I also managed to find some frames that I have been wanting for some art that I want to do. Delle and I managed to go through a box of adult clothes that had been put away as well as a box and a half of baby clothes (some of which I remember my “little” bro wearing).

After this I figured I better get home to get some of my own housework done. BUt I did decide that I really need to get to the farm once a week so that I can go through more of my stuff that I have out there. Maybe once I have gone through all my different stuff I can actually start getting rid of some of it on eBay or in a yard sale. And I have projects that I have been wanting to do but “don’t have the supplies for” or the space/time to do. I think that is one of the things that I just need to make happen.

Needless to say, as random as this post and day kind of was I do feel that it was productive. And that makes me happy.

Have a good day, night, morning… Whatever time it is for you. 🙂 I never know what I’m really going to be writing about that’s why my new posts are so inconsistent.


Ranting :C sorry guys :S

Not what you guys wanted me to write, eh? Frankly I don’t care, I don’t even know if I am going to publish this post or not. If I do and you read this Jason, take a hint! For everybody else, don’t cross that line… That being said it is still healthy and sometimes therapeutic to simply write down everything that is on your mind, Kinda like hugs. So everything that’s on my mind…

Tight budgets suck. I don’t really need to elaborate on that but I think I will anyways. I don’t mind working, I just wish that me working full-time would be enough to actually make all the ends meet better. As it is, we are making do because we have to, and honestly I don’t know if that will be enough.  I don’t do well with hand outs otherwise I’d probably ask but I have too much pride for that. I know I know, pride can be your own undoing. :S

Next item on the brain… Jason is a pain in the ass! One of my gas jockeys does not refrain from complementing me and trying to buy me stuff to the point that I am very close to telling him to screw off!. I appreciate a complement and all but not again and again all the time. And sure I like it if someone randomly buys me a chocolate bar, but that doesn’t mean try to buy me one every freaking day. And if I tell him I don’t want one then he jumps to the conclusion that I “hate him” and I sit there going “no I don’t hate you, I just want you to leave me alone and accept the fact that I’m happily married”. 3 days ago when I drove to work I parked “lazy” and he instantly thought I didn’t like him and that was why I didn’t park right beside him. He also seems to be under my feet too much; it’s to the point that between him and my son I feel like I never get a moment for myself. I don’t have a problem with my son wanting to spend every waking moment with me, but when a man who is 20 years older than me tells me incessantly that I’m a cutie and beautiful and he wants to spend more time with me and he wishes I weren’t married it gets to be a bit much. Needless to say I think you get the point.

Wow that bit kinda wiped all the other crap that was on my mind away… sorry about that rant but it was kinda needed. Ok, next thing. Trying to maintain the house, as in keep it clean, never seems to work and it drives me nuts. (I think) I am finally making a bit of progress, I got the back porch cleaned up some, to the point that I actually dare to use it a bit. I have also gotten the basement cleaned up some. I still have a ton of crap to go through and to small of kids clothes to put away. And when it’s clean enough I need to get more of my stuff from the farm because as easy-going as my dad is being about it I still don’t need to have enough stuff there to furnish a second house. But because I was actually trying to get the basement and porch cleaned up I got behind on daily things like dishes and keeping the rest of the house tidy so now it has to get legit cleaned. :S That is always an overwhelming thought for me.

Lacking ambition can be aggravating. I came up with an idea of something that I want to try using stuff I keep finding around the house. BUT rather than actually start on it I keep putting it off under the guise that I either don’t have the time for it, the space for it or the right tools to do it. If you actually want to do something it can be rather easy to actually do it… I think I am going to try to organize stuff in the porch that hasn’t been started, and put stuff in the basement when it’s done. I’m not sure where I’m going to work on things, I think that’ll happen on the kitchen table but i don’t know if I’ll be able to finish a whole project in one day so that could result in me having crap all over the kitchen for a few days.

Back on the topic of budgets sucking, I’d also like to be able to have a little lenience with the money as well as having some money put away for a rainy day as the saying goes. But that doesn’t matter cause first we are going to get through this month.

Another thing that drives me nuts is when people have a whole ton of drama happening in their life and rather than just tell you a little bit about it they full-out drag you into the middle of it. Sometime I sit there going I don’t care/I don’t want to get involved, but noo that’s not ok. But I’ll get into this more on a different post.

But that’s enough for today, I really don’t have anything else that I feel I need to rant about and I do feel much better. Thanks for “listening”. 😛

Just Have Fun

I think the title sums up this post pretty well.

Every now and then I’ll be doing something really random at work and my co-workers will ask me (with a very puzzled look) what I’m doing. My answer is often enough “being silly and having fun”. It saddens me that in today’s society having fun and being silly is not really the norm any more. To often we have decided that for us to be able to have fun we need to be doing something that is time-consuming and/or expensive. That’s not the truth, we just often forget the truth because it gets put on the back burner. Don’t get me wrong, concerts, ski trips and expensive summer vacations can all be fun; but it doesn’t replace the simple fun that people can have but choose not too.

Some of my best memories from my childhood are ones that do not cost money (or at least not a lot), they simply required a child’s imagination. I grew up on a farm (which is something that I am very proud of) and as such we had lots of room to play outside without getting in the way. One of my favourite memories is when my younger brother and I made a ball path in our “sand hill”. All the expense that went into it was the cost of the ball and our sand shovels but we played there for hours. Often when I see that hill that is what I think of. I have no idea if my brother even remembers it happening but I do and that’s what counts. A different memory that I have is of my family laying in the snow when it was dark out and looking up at the sky and watching the snowflakes fall. The way the snowflakes caught the light from the porch light made it look like stars that were falling to the earth gracefully. This is a memory that I love and I really hope to be able to recreate with my family now, unfortunately I don’t know if I’ll be able to because there are somethings that happen once in a life time.

A recent fun time that I had that didn’t cost anything happened this spring/summer. It was one of those days where I felt horrible and all I wanted to do was lay on the couch and watch tv but this was making me feel bad for my son. He’s four and has always loved to go outside and this day was no different. He was being patent with me and trying to play nice in a way that didn’t disturb me but every once in a while he would ask if we could go outside. I finally decided that enough was enough and me not feeling well shouldn’t inhibit my son’s spring day. We bundled up and put on our rubber boots and went outside and started puddle jumping. We didn’t even go the whole way around the block (the alley had better ruts and better puddles) but we had a blast. It didn’t make my stomach ache go away completely but I did feel better partly because I felt like I was being a better parent. One car that my son waved to as they passed even gave me a thumbs up, this made me feel so good because I knew I was being a good parent. It might not have been the “proper” way for me to act but I didn’t care, I was doing good-by my son’s eyes. The worst part of that whole experience was peeling off wet jeans when we got home cause when you splash big it doesn’t stop at the top of your rubber boots. 😀

Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that life isn’t always as bad as we think/feel it is. It could always be worse. People complain to me about different things that are going on and I usually manage to find a way that it could be worse (I’m the foolish one who asks my customers how things are going). I don’t know if they always appreciate the fact that I do it but to often people look at life with a negative view, and when we do that we forget to have fun. Bad thing… I don’t have any money for            ; good side of not having money: you learn to be more creative with the things that you do have. Bad thing: the weather isn’t as good as you want it to be (I think the snow is here to stay now); better way to look at it: the weather stayed nice for longer than it could have (the snow in September didn’t stay).

Having fun is often a matter of perspective. I have also found that at times it is a choice you have to make. Often when I ask customers how their day is going they do the same for me. I never feel that it is appropriate for my customers to hear me whine about whatever bad thing is happening so I usually tell them “pretty good” sometimes I go as far as to say that “I’m wonderful” or that my day is “fantastic”. Eventually this usually makes my day seem better and the bad aspects of my day not seem like such a big deal. Please do make a point to have fun, and the less money the fun costs you the better. When is the last time that you went for a nice relaxing walk or you drew a silly picture and actually hung it up for others to see? Do do these things, and if people have the audacity to mock you for doing suggest that they do the same because chances are that they haven’t had some simple fun in quite a while.  Please take a moment to remember a free fun memory just for me, I promise you will thank yourself later. 🙂

Being Proud


adjective, prouder, proudest.
1. feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something regarded as highly honorable or creditable to oneself (often followed by of, an infinitive, or a clause).
2. having, proceeding from, or showing a high opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, or superiority.
3. having or showing self-respect or self-esteem.

      Being proud and having pride is an interesting subject for me to approach. Often I feel that pride is a bad thing, especially because many times it has a negative connotation with it. (Pride goes before a fall…) Yesterday at work I decided to write about having pride because I found myself  being proud, both of my co-worker and myself. This pride came from the fact that my Korean co-worker was having trouble remembering the English word for lock. She asked me for help and I did help her, but rather than just give her the word (it’s a lock…) I asked her what she did when she left the house. Her answer was not proper grammar (door lock) but it helped her receive the correct word that she was looking for. She looked proud of herself for having figured it out and it also made me proud of myself for being there to help her with her grammar. But it didn’t stop there, I was also exceedingly proud of her for figuring it out and not stopping because I knew what she was trying to say. I get to see the challenges that she is faced with by learning a new language (which can be difficult) but I also get to see her overcome them all because she has the courage to keep trying even when she makes mistakes.

     Another thing that I am proud of is the fact that I have never been in an accident (or at least not while I was the driver). I was talking with a long time truck driver about me being proud for having not been in an accident. I commented that it was a kind of silly thing to be proud of and he told me not to think of it that way because it is a good thing to take pride in. This being said I am still a careful driver to the point that on occasion other drivers honk at me because I am being to careful. I feel that it is better to be to careful and cautious as opposed to being very aggressive and getting in accidents. Sometimes we need to take pride in things that others might not, people are not all made the same so we can’t all expect to find pride in the same things.

    Something that I did not always understand other people having pride in is the way that their children grow. But I am learning that pride is becoming a relatively common (and normal) feeling with watching my son grow. He is learning the different colors and shapes as well as his numbers and letters. Once in a while it seems that he is ahead of other children his age and that makes me very proud of him as a mother but on other occasions he seems a little bit behind and it is on these occasions that I remind myself that all kids grow at a different rate. He is healthy and happy so I don’t tend to worry about other things as much as I could. It is at these times that I realize that I am glad that other parents are not boastful because then it would take away from the pride that I have in my son. And at the same time I realize that there is a difference between being proud and being boastful.

    It is good to have pride in things that you have accomplished, whether it is well done or not according to other people. It is also a good thing to have pride in and for others. But that does not mean that you should be boastful about it and always talk about how you did this better than the next person. People like to hear how other people are normal and modest about their accomplishments. Not having them be shoved in their face in a way that they are forced to acknowledge them being better than the rest of society. So please keep this in mind, it’s not always bad to be proud of yourself or of others; it is just bad when we let our own pride inflate our ego, that is for other people to do. Be proud but be humble about it.

And now that that odd post is done… I am sorry if it seems rather disjointed in the way that it was written; I wrote it over two days and as such I realized I wanted to add different bits in throughout the whole post. Next time I will do my best to finish a whole post in one sitting.

Catching up on turkey day

I know that I was supposed to do a new blog post a while a go, but I’m still trying to get into the habit of it.

Thanksgiving went well. There were lots of pies, and they were very delicious. I will admit that I was a wee bit disappointed when we got there and the other sisters were off giving my nephew’s new girlfriend a tour of our area. But I did enjoy being able to visit with the “boys” and feel like I was actually part of the conversation. (We have a big family: 2 boys and 5 girls. All married with kids except for my “little” brother.) Because our family is so big I often feel like I have trouble finding a conversation that I fit into, but this thanksgiving I did. And that’s another thing that I’m thankful for.

In my mind I often underplay the importance of making time to visit with others. I often feel that if they want to visit with me then they will say that and ask me over for coffee. But I fail to remember the times that they have and I was already busy, whether it was because I had to work that evening or something else. But as we were at the farm on thanksgiving visiting with everybody I remembered the importance of making that effort. I don’t think my siblings realize how much I enjoy it when they call or text me just to say “hi”. And once in awhile they stop by when I’m at work and it helps brighten up my whole day.

I feel like this post is missing something by my little man is begging me to go outside so I figure I should while the weather is still nice enough to comply. As a quick summery, even if you don’t always like to be around people (cause that’s often how I feel) do make an effort to be around the people that make you feel more complete. Chances are that if they cheer up your day simply by saying “hi” you should make a point in visiting them.

Have a good day, call your mom and tell her you love her. And I’ll be back next week. (I promise I’ll do my best.)

New Beginnings?

This is my first "post" that I had had on Facebook and now I'm moving it over here... 
I am hoping to write another blog post later today or tomorrow.

Hey Everyone. I have been thinking of starting a blog (but I keep thinking of it as an online journal) for a while. I didn’t really have any idea as to where I should start. I was hoping to get into it more this week but I’ve been busy (which is a bit of a bad excuse). Needless to say I did get some visiting done, I also did a small art project and I got my pumpkin pies made for tomorrow. I thought it would be good to just write a little something thou because often when we get the wheels turning and keep going slowly, things turn into a habit. And this would be a good habit.  🙂 

  I don’t guarantee anything. Whether it’s consistency or proper grammar or spelling (actually kind of the opposite when it comes to spelling cause my spelling is quite horrible). But I will try to improve on all accounts, I would also accept positive criticism (but if it’s ignored chances are that I’m ignoring it for a reason).

This Monday is Thanksgiving for us in Canada and as such my week has been filled with Thanksgiving thoughts. Like I said I got my pie made for my family turkey fest, I still need to make buns. And I have been thinking of things that I am thankful for. Here is my Thanksgiving list so far:

  • my husband and my son (they are healthy, happy and helpful; they have a talent for making me smile and occasionally trying my patients)
  • Family (they have been very helpful for me this past week and the help is carrying on to next weekend)
  • Friends
  • our home
  • my job
  • my vehicle

The list could keep going but I think you guys get the idea, and my lunch is trying to boil over…

I will try to write again next week. Have a happy and safe Thanksgiving everyone. 🙂